David Cried Too: When Faith Doesn’t Make the Hurt Disappear

By TaShara Davis, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor | Founder, Brighter Side Counseling

There are moments when you aren’t just tired.

You’re tired of being strong.

Tired of meeting expectations. Tired of managing other people’s emotions while trying to manage your own. Tired of feeling attacked, betrayed, or like somehow everything you’re doing still isn’t enough.

Sometimes you cry.

Sometimes you shut down.

Sometimes anxiety takes over, your thoughts start spiraling, and the emotional exhaustion begins showing up physically.

And sometimes you can’t even find joy in the things that normally bring it.

I’ve had those moments.

I’ve sat in my car in the garage because I couldn’t make myself get out yet. I’ve gotten into my bed expecting comfort to come and realized that even my safe place couldn’t quiet everything happening inside of me.

And I’ve prayed prayers that weren’t pretty.

I’ve cried. I’ve questioned. I’ve begged God to make it stop. I’ve even been angry enough that the words coming out weren’t the kind we usually put in inspirational posts about faith.

But then I think about David.

David knew God. David loved God. David had faith in God.

And David cried.

In Psalm 6:6, he described himself as worn out from groaning and spending the night in tears. In Psalm 56:8, he spoke about God keeping track of his sorrow and his tears.

Scripture didn’t hide those parts of David.

So why do we feel like we have to hide ours?

Strength Doesn’t Mean You Stop Being Human

When you’re the person everyone expects to be strong, showing emotion can feel dangerous.

Cry too much and you’re “emotional.” Admit you’re overwhelmed and maybe you’re incompetent. Say you’re struggling and suddenly people wonder whether you’re capable.

So we keep functioning.

We work. We lead. We parent. We take care of people. We solve problems. We keep showing up.

But strength isn’t the absence of human emotion.

You can be strong and hurt.

You can be capable and exhausted.

You can know God loves you and still ask Him why something hurts so badly.

You can have faith and still cry.

“Give it to God” doesn’t magically remove the emotions we experience as human beings. Faith gives us somewhere to bring those emotions. It doesn’t require us to pretend they aren’t there.

Sometimes faith looks less like knowing everything will be okay and more like not knowing if it will be okay and walking by faith anyway.

Sometimes the World Has to Take a Backseat

Sometimes the healthiest thing we can do is step back.

Take the mental health day.

Let the phone wait. Let somebody else figure something out. Let the world take a backseat long enough for the noise to stop being so loud.

As a counselor, I also know there is a difference between going through a painful season and becoming stuck in one.

Pay attention to the frequency. The intensity. What brings the feelings on. How much they’re interfering with your life. And especially, how difficult it has become to come back out of that place.

Sometimes we need rest.

Sometimes we need boundaries.

Sometimes we need counseling.

And sometimes we need to seriously reconsider what we keep allowing access to our peace.

Because eventually we have to ask a harder question:

Whatever has you feeling this way, does it deserve to continue having this much access to your life?

That question still matters when the answer involves a job, a friendship, a relationship, or even family.

David cried.

David questioned.

David hurt.

And David was still a man of faith.

Your tears don’t automatically mean you’ve lost yours either.

Maybe tonight you don’t need another reminder to be strong.

Maybe you need permission to be human.

And maybe after the tears dry, the question isn’t simply, How do I get strong enough to keep carrying this?

Maybe it’s:

Do I need to keep carrying it at all?